To Me from Me

I decided to get myself a present for Christmas. After much mental flirtation with replacing our existing family PC with a Dell, to save a couple bucks, I ultimately decided to go with the 20" 2.4 GHz iMac. I submitted my order through the Apple online store just moments ago, no buyer's remorse yet.

Ultimately, it needed to be done. The ol' PowerBook G4 has been showing its age under the hood. New apps were slow, other apps not supported on a G4 PPC chipset, the screen was small (12 inches). So this just felt good.

My wife and two kids use the family computer a lot, so they're set in their ways. Switching over to a Dell might have gotten me killed. The schools use OS X for computer studies at the boys' elementary school, so the transition to home-use is seamless.

It's also nice to just use the thing and not worry about drivers, DLL's, security, viruses, all the stuff that we worry about at work. So its a good choice for the family. No regrets.

Wow, come to think of it, 2007 has been a total technology year:
- the HD PVR cable terminal
- the LCD HDTV
- the iMac
- iPod Touch
- a new DV camcorder
- a new digital camera
- XBox 360

Sheesh! What's going to be the theme for 2008?

Disney Hangover

Well, so much for that trip. Two weeks away and we're back, we now have the ol' vacation hangover.

The second week of our trip was all Disney. We stayed at the Beach Club resort, which was mere steps away from Epcot. It was totally bizarre to just step out your door and be at the park. Last year, we packed up the van, packed a few backpacks, drove to DisneyWorld, parked, took the transport to the park entrance, etc, etc.... This was totally the way to do it.

The little varmints had a really good time at Disney. The older boy hit the roller coasters that he didn't want to go on last year: Expedition Everest, Rockin' Roller Coaster. And the little feller went on some rides too.


Before we left, we watched the Toy Story movies. He got totally into Buzz Lightyear. As luck would have it, he got to meet him and shoot some targets at Buzz Lightyear's Spin Zone. You basically go in and try to shoot these targets.


All the parks were all done up for Christmas (sorry, "Holiday Season"). Something very weird about sweltering 27 degree humid heat with Christmas music in the background. All the parades were Christmas themed, and they even did a cool effect on Cinderella's Castle:


Through some selective lighting, they added some "icicles" to the Castle. This also added a cool effect to the fireworks show. Right now our heads are spinning, we did so much. This is the hangover part. After awhile, we'll be able to look back and recall what we did.

But now I'm going to work on the backyard rink. But its got to get a lot colder than this!

Universal Studios .... check!

We had to go back to do Universal Studios, and once again it was clear of crowds. There were very few people around. When we were at Islands of Adventure, we weren't sure if it was a fluke, the fact that there was hardly anyone there. No fluke.

Where is everybody?

So, seeing as how there were few people there, the most we waited at any one line was under 10 minutes. We pretty much had the park done by 4:00, we got there at 10:00. Some of the highlights were Shrek 4-D, Return of the Mummy, and Men in Black, those were fun. There were more rides, but they weren't as fun.

The kids section was a pleasant surprise once again. The little guy had a "Picnic in the Park with Barney". That pretty much made the day for him.


Once you've been to the Universal Studio Parks, you pretty much feel like you've "done it", there's no need to return in the near future. But, they do have big plans for 2008/09, so let's see if its enough to make us want to come back.

Honestly, we wanted to treat Universal as a taster for Disney, which starts tomorrow for us. Tomorrow morning we're going to check out of our condo here and move over to our next condo at Disney Beach Club.

The day before yesterday, we checked out "Downtown Disney". The highlight for us had to have been Legoland.
Legoland had quite a few massive statues, all constructed with Lego. We thought this was kind of cool. We ended up buying a big slurpee cup full of Lego to take home. Lego by the scoopfull, what a concept!

The little feller also got to meet his favourite Disney character at Downtown Disney:

The weather cooled off for us on this day, somewhere in the low 20's. But, its going to get right back up there into the high 20's for the rest of the week, so there'll have to be lots of pool time.

We also tried an outlet mall today, pretty massive. But no real screaming deals. I remember a day when a U.S. outlet mall caused me to drool and froth at the mouth. But the prices just don't rattle my chain anymore. Maybe the on-par dollar.

In the meantime, our attention shifts full time to Disney.....

Visitors From Virginia

As alluded to earlier, Air Canada did start our trip out on a sour note. The flight to Calgary was fine, we had the on-demand video thing going on. Great for the kids. But the Toronto Airport hotel was small, and Pearson airport is all about business. Not really a place to frolic and kill time like Calgary International.

Once we got to our Condo, things were great! We're feeling the love from our condo. I snapped off some pics...

Our condo complex turned out to be really really cool. When we approached the check in area, our two boys were intercepted by a couple of Kids Coordinators. They promptly whipped them up some balloon animals, they played Nintendo, and they were invited to a kid's pool party. We were blown away. Everyone's so friendly.

So we settled in. Monday was Universal Studios Islands of Adventure day....

There was a huge chunk of the park dedicated to Jurassic Park. We went on the River Ride, some dinosaurs roared at us. It was a good time in the Jurassic Park area.
A pleasant surprise was the Dr Seuss area. The four year-old got all the rides he could handle. So the rest of us tagged along and really enjoyed it too. We thought that this area would be a couple of rides, and that was it. But noooooooo. She's a serious part of the park. A really cool thing is that it was set up with Christmas decorations. Nice touch.
So, one thing that surprised us was the crowds, or lack thereof. Above is a picture of Islands of Adventure's most prominent eatery. No one was there. The time was 11:45am. Pretty much lunch time. Very quiet. The park was pretty empty, so we had our run of the place. We walked on to the Hulk roller coaster, the Dueling Dragons roller coaster, Spiderman, and all the rest of the rides. No waits!!

There was one casualty. On the van-ride home, the one fallen little soldier....

We need to go back to Universal Studios to go to the movie studios part. That's next. But we may have to hang out at the pool tomorrow for a break. You have to pace yourself, right?

Plus, the heat's a killer. 27 degrees with monster humidity today.

Our rental minivan has Virginia plates for some reason. So, I guess we're Virginians for a week. Its a useful way to identify our white minivan in a sea of white minivans in the parking lots around here.

Air Canada Hates Us

I am going to tell you a twisted tale of horror. A tale that will make your soul burn with pure visceral hatred. A tale about an evil empire that wields its flaccid sword towards on comers. This is a tale of Air Canada.

As some of you know, we're planning a two-week trip to DisneyWorld, Florida. We finalized these plans last January. Since then, we've been going stark raving mad with anticipation.
The flight was booked last January with Aeroplan points. There were three reasons why we went with Air Canada: (1) We could use the points, (2) It was a direct flight to Orlando and (3) we had no idea Air Canada hated kids. Since we have two young boys, the importance of a direct flight cannot be emphasized enough. When we did DisneyWorld in 2006, we went by WestJet direct to Orlando. When we went to Hawaii the year before that, there was a changeover in Vancouver. These changeovers are a killer with kids in tow. Apparently, these airlines have a policy that you can't use kennels for kids, you can't stow them in cargo. Whatever.

On Sunday, the boys' Grandma gets a call from Air Canada that our family-friendly Orlando flight had been cancelled. We had been reassigned a red-eye flight that left Calgary at midnight to Toronto, then change planes to Orlando. Grandma called to protest indicating that we had young kids with us, but it fell on deaf ears. Any effort to compromise came with resistance. In the end, we're getting there over two days: day one Calgary / Toronto, day two Toronto / Orlando. We pay for the hotel in Toronto. We get an extra hotel bill, and a big ol' middle finger from Air Canada.

I told this story to my co-worker Jabba. As she was munching on a chicken-wing, she wisely stated that companies have this bass-ackwards. Shouldn't customers who redeem loyalty points be treated like gold? Air Canada, as yourself this: how did we come to collect these "points"? Ever hear of a company called "WestJet"? Are you aware that this is not 1990, there is actual competition now?

Jabba vented her disgust with a mighty burp. I touched a nerve.

So, it is my duty as a customer to pass on my story. I hope you remember this story the next time you are confronted with the choice of Air Canada or WestJet.

The Toy Hall of Fame: a Contribution

The U.S. National Toy Hall of Fame has inducted the Kite, the Atari 2600, and the Raggedy Andy doll into its hallowed halls. I had no idea such an institution existed. Apparently, its pretty new with only 39 inductees, with various toys like the Barbie, Play-Doh, and Lego.

Seems like a good idea, so I'll help them out a bit. Here are my personal recommendations for the Hall, based on my own personal toy collection when I was a wee lad:

(1) Rock 'em Sock 'em Robots : According to photographic record, this was a Christmas gift. I was pretty young at the time, so I don't recall ever receiving it. But the evidence of this toy's impact on my me is unmistakable. Photos from this Christmas depict me battling my first opponent, my Grandfather, in Rock 'em Sock 'em. No winner is evident, but since I seemingly could only barely press down those buttons, I suspect I was handily defeated. And, yes, my Grandfather and I are still on speaking terms.

(2) Big Jim : This particular toy has my earliest recollection. I do recall playing with it and granting it "favourite toy" status for a period of time. That's about it. But it must have been a pretty impressive toy. I probably had Big Jim beating the crap out of all my other toys, good ol' Jim.

(3) Commodore 64 : this "toy" became an obsession. I remember spending hours on this thing. I remember engaging in verbal battle with my family in order to commandeer the TV, so I could hook 'er up. We were a one TV home at the time, but soon became a two TV home. I recall the emotional scarring of never having received the highly coveted C64 accessories: the cutting edge "dot-matrix" printer, and the "modem" you actually rest your phone handset on.

(4) Walkie Talkie : When I got this toy, I lived near a wooded patch in Esquimalt, a kind of suburb of Victoria. I remember spending hours with my buddies with these walkie talkies in the woods. Esquimalt had a large military presence, so the other army kids would always want to portray some sort of mission, as I remember. I wonder how many of the ol' gang are currently incarcerated?

(5) Cap Gun : Easily the most politically incorrect toy I ever played with. What made this thing cool was the loud bang, that was the selling point. As I recall, none of us "pulled up on the five-oh pull out a glock and bus' a cap in his ass". None of that at all. It was just plain ol' shooting a gun. The target was inconsequential.

I would pursue a position on the selection committee of the Toy Hall of Fame, but I'll be too busy with boys in hockey.

Shock Discovery in Zoological Science.

Apparently you can't put a Hippopotamus in a crate for 29 hours and expect it to do so well. We know this because we have experts to tell us this. I just read this crazy article that begun with the words: "'Twenty-nine hours is too long for most animals to be transported in a crate' said an expert." While you may be quick to dismiss this as normal liberal media bias, you may be shocked to find out these other facts about zoo animals:

• Most require a substance to be regularly ingested, this substance is called "food".


• Zookeepers are required to close door to animal enclosures, or else they'll escape.


• Putting Zebras in the same enclosure as the Lions has a negative effect on the Zebra.


• Despite the claims made in movies such as "Barnyard", "Ice Age", and "Lion King", the animals can't actually talk.


• Spider monkeys don't make cobwebs.


• Lastly, despite the bad smell and the proliferation of un-hygienic bipedal creatures, "Winnipeg" is not an actual zoo.

As we advance in society, the science of biology and zoology also must advance. But I think we can learn from our friends in Saskatchewan. They seem to sincerely "get it". They seem to understand the true nature of animals (see below picture for evidence):

Easy Pickin's

Exhibit "A": satellite photo of the crime scene.

(click photo to expand)

A couple Sundays ago, I was busted for speeding. Yep, I got me a speeding ticket. It was about 7:00 am on a Sunday morning, I was driving my boy to hockey practice. I was going north on 52nd Street SE, then turned right to go east on 17th Avenue SE, intending to make my way to Chestermere. After two blocks, what I thought was some guy attempting to jaywalk was actually a police officer directing me to the side of the road.

"I'm stopping you because you were going 75 in a 50 Kilometer zone." The policeman said to me.
"Here's my license, hang on a sec, I'll get my the other stuff for you." I reached for the glove box, but before I opened it the officer interrupted.
"Just your license is fine."

About half a minute to a minute later I had my freshly earned speeding ticket in hand. $175 was the damage. That's Canadian dollars, too! "Here's your license back. I'm issuing you a speeding ticket today for exceeding the 50 Km/H speed limit, so here you are. Drive safe." Those were to cop's quickly spoken parting words. As he handed me my ticket, I noticed a sign over the policeman's right shoulder. The sign read "60 Km/H Maximum".

I'll first say that I'm going to "man up" and pay the fine. Technically, he got me. But, I live in a democracy that values free speech dammit! So here's what really browns me about this speeding ticket.

This was a "technical speeding" ticket.
There were no stores open. There were no cars on the road. And this stretch of road had all the appearances of being a freeway. The manner in which I was driving was safe, no question. Look at the above picture: it’s a divided highway.

No posted speed limit
Since getting this ticket, I've driven the boy to hockey practice a few times. After you turn off 52nd street to go east on 17th Ave, the signs go: 60, 80, then 100. Then you reach Chestermere. There is no 50 sign. This does not mean the officer was incorrect, he's technically right. If he nabs you just before the 60 sign, he's got you for exceeding a 50. I was clocked about 50-70 metres before the 60 sign.

In and Out
I was expecting to hear some "advice" from the officer: "This is a high collision area, that's why we're monitoring it". Or "a speeding awareness campaign is in effect." or SOMETHING. The cop processed my speeding ticket the way McDonalds processes a hamburger. Quick. Get 'em in. Get 'em out. Next!

I'm left with a sense that some police officers don't really care about nabbing unsafe drivers. I was issued a ticket because I was easy pickin's. It was easy to get me. I was the only car on the road, going at a menacing 75 in a 60, er, I mean 50. I could not have been easier to get. But is this type of police-work supposed to be easy?

A Challenge!

While I was in Boston a couple weeks back, I decided to seize the opportunity to pick up a few things for my boys. For my four year-old, I picked him up a few toys, which he really liked. But for my eight year-old, I decided "what the hell", and got him an Xbox 360. The Canadian dollar is on a tear, and there still is a bit of a price gap with some merchandise between US and Canadian dollars. So I scooped up the Xbox, and NHL 08.

When I showed the boy, naturally he jumped out of his skin, yelling, screaming, fist-pumping, he was pretty happy. We then went down to our little Home Theatre room and hooked it up to the HDTV. I was mildly surprised that it was full 1080p over HD Composite cables, but I was blown away once the kid started playing an actual game. Wow!

After we played a bit, I signed us up for Xbox Live, but this was not a quick-n-dirty set up. I wanted to use a healthy dose of paranoia, making our account as family friendly as possible. So after this was set up, we decided to take on the world. This adds a completely different element to playing console sports games, playing against different people. I know that I got the thing for the boys, but I can't help myself! The silly thing is a huge amount of fun! And the people are great, no dick-heads yet! They must not have the Internet in Winnipeg yet.

I recall the last time I gamed online I had my tail handed to me quite regularly at a game called "Command and Conquer". I can still hear those words "Your base is under attack" ringing in my ear. I'm ready for retribution.

So I hereby challenge you all to a game of either NHL 08, or Madden 08, on Xbox Live! My gamertag is BowValleyHutch. Bring it on!

Futureshop ad question...

Hey, how come the guy in this Futureshop commercial can build a mobile, speaking robot, but needs help buying a simple laptop computer?

Some Boston Thoughts That Linger

It's been exactly one week since I returned from Boston, so I thought it would be a good exercise to see just which memories about Boston remain after one week. Which things, big or small, come to mind when I look back? I was there on conference, so I didn't get a tonne of time to check out New England in minute detail, but I did get a chance to stroll around like the common-folk. So here are the first 5 thoughts that spring to mind.

Size

Boston (metropolitan) has a population of 4.5 Million. However, the actual city of Boston only has a population of 590,000. I guess I've been watching too many movies, I was expecting this huge city teeming with mega sky scrapers that would dwarf Calgary's. Though a sense of history and culture in Boston is palpable, it's size was surprisingly "normal".

MIT/Harvard

I had two definite goals: see MIT, see Harvard. Well, okay, a third: bring back gifts for my boys. MIT was like I imagined. It had a huge lawn, pock-marked with well-aged trees. Students were sitting, each leaning up against a tree, reading their textbooks surrounded by freshly fallen auburn-coloured leaves. Surrounding the main yard were massive white stone pillars, each with a name of a prominent scientist: Archimedes, Newton, er... I forget the others, but they were famous. Harvard was a different egg. Harvard Yard was sort of like I pictured it: old buildings full of character, massive trees, students playing a game of ultimate. But Harvard has these major road arteries going around and through it, which was not what I expected. It didn't seem like the usual university with a definable perimeter. But I can't understate the character of the historical buildings. I was snapping off pictures like a wild-man. Beautiful buildings! You could stare at them for hours.

Political Fervor

This is similar to the province of Alberta, but on the flip side. The Boston area is Democrat territory. Make no mistake about this. All the local bookstores I strolled into had prominent displays of books on politics, all Democrat related material. They love their politics, so long as its Democrat related. Funny thing, I found myself in quite a few convenience stores and gift shops. At the counter, they all had either a display of Obama or Clinton buttons, or a display box of Obama or Clinton playing cards. I saw nothing GOP related. Nothing. Bostonians are debating between Obama and Clinton, not GOP and DNC.

New York rivalry

I thought the Calgary / Edmonton, or Calgary / Vancouver rivalries were intense. The day after the Mets were eliminated from the post-season picture, I saw the covers of two local Boston papers. One pictured a boy, about 8 years-old, wearing a Mets hat. This boy had tears streaming down his cheeks, very upset. What did the headline read? "A Cryin' Shame: Mets eliminated from play-offs". Wow. Harsh, eh? The paper right beside it had a Mets fan in the stands standing up with arms outstretched facing the sky with a look of agony, as if his leg was caught in a bear trap. The headline? "From Champs to Chumps". Also, in the hotel bar I overheard this lady say to her friend that the Sox won so they just had to watch tomorrow's game to "make sure the Yanks lose". There is some serious dislike here, folks.

All in all, you will be hard pressed to find a more culture-rich, historic, unique town. I'd be thrilled if I had a chance to go back. But to be honest, I'm really curious to head to New York next, get their side of the story.

My iPod Touch Review

Yes, I know. There are more reviews out there than Jabba takes trips to the buffet. But here's one more anyway. I'm sure you can suffer from another one.

I got my new iPod yesterday when I got home from work. The box was so small, I actually thought it was the cell phone battery we ordered on eBay. I opened the box, it was my new iPod. I soiled myself.

The first thing I did was to plug 'er into the Mac via the USB port. For my 12 GB worth of stuff, it took about half an hour. I was dying to play with it, so the half an hour seemed like half a day, or like sitting through a cat owner telling a "funny cat story".

When it was done, my finger stroked the glistening metal and glass longingly. My eyes widened. I trembled with anticipation. A sense of fear overcame me, how would it react to my touch? Do I employ a gentle caress, or probe it aggressively with my fingertip? Anyway. I digress.

The first thing I noticed was how damn thin it is. Thinner than an Oreo cookie. But it looks really cool, like a piece of art. After synching it, I methodically checked out the rest of the features:

Wi-Fi / Safari

The Wi-Fi discovery feature works just like an ordinary PC, it lists the networks who broadcast their SSID's. I found mine, then punched in the passcode (which is "igocommando4ever"). Safari was then a "go", so I surfed a few sites. Very cool. Using a double-tap, or a pinch, you can zoom in and out. I was surprised at how snappy it was.

Movies

The screen is watchable. Pay no attention to those myopic reviewers who gripe about its size. The quality makes up for its lack of size (why is this sentence sounding like I've heard it before?). I loaded in an artsy movie, a "film" actually, starring an Austrian actor, called "Commando". Looked fine. Watchable. But very detailed, good quality.

Photos

Depending on how you orient your iPod, the pictures will adjust. It reads minds. Picture in landscape mode? Hold your iPod horizontally and it adjusts. You meander through your photos with a flick of the finger. Like the browser, you can re size photos with the double-tap, or pinch technique. Tres cool!

Using it:

I was really worried about my reliance on the ol' click-wheel. I had that thing down PAT! I was the click-wheel MAN! Although it takes some getting used to, I'm already whipping through the tunes with some degree of efficiency. Unless you are a one-armed person, you won't find this a problem.

Other:

There's a dedicated "You Tube" button. This is a direct pipeline to the world of You Tube, it is not a Browser shortcut. This surprised me, how nifty it was. The iTunes music store is also a button tap away. Sooooo easy to impulse buy a song, so be careful. All the other stuff, I care only mildly about: Calendar, Calculator, Contacts, "yawn". So I'll play more later.

Conclusion:

Overall, no buyer's remorse. I needed a new one. The old iPod was showing its age, and as Society says: "We must discard that which is old. It is no good." It was a good purchase. I've only had it for less than 24 hours, but I have a good feeling that this is the start of a beautiful partnership.

Thumbs up!

Sure Looks Cool, So Where's Mine?

I've been somewhat successful as of late in blocking my new iPod out of my mind. Last week, I went to the Apple website and watched the iPod Touch demo a few dozen times, each time adding to the excruciating agony of "the wait". So I resolved to try to be like those nut-jobs who walk on the red-hot rocks to demonstrate their mental ability to block out external pain. I'll just "forget" that I'm waiting for this delivery.

Well, as of this morning, that pain was re-introduced. My office mate brought in her new iPod Nano and was showing it off this morning. So how was it? Quite honestly, it was very impressive. I checked out the iPod's new "Cover Flow" interface and was pleasantly surprised. It didn't seem gimmicky at all, once you select your album, it flips around and shows you the song, as if you were flipping over a real CD case. Pretty Snazzy. It definitely ups the bar.

The next logical thing to check out is the video capability. The screen is admittedly not huge, but I would say that its watchable. I didn't appreciate the "adult-oriented" video she had playing for demo purposes, so I asked her to put on a music video. The Michael Jackson video was actually pretty crisp and clear. For catching up on a TV show: fine. For watching a feature length movie: challenging.

So my torture will continue for the next few weeks. Keep in mind that the person that showed me her new iPod, affectionately known as Jabba, is pure evil. She KNEW that I was trying to put it out of my consciousness. Vicious woman! How she ended up getting hitched to a fine, upstanding, law-abiding, hygienic, individual I have no idea. Life, eh?

Again, as stated in an earlier post, I am accepting notes of encouragement and good-will. Please send at your convenience.

The Wait is Killing Me!

The iPod Touch is now available at some Apple stores in the US, according to AppleInsider.com. Now, this causes me some discomfort. The fact that some guy who just strolled into an Apple store and bought one at the counter and took it home, sort of irks me. As soon as the new iPods were made available through the online Apple store, I whipped out my MasterCard at lightning speed and ordered one. However, sadly, online customers will have to wait until the Friday after next, Sept 28, for their goodies to start shipping.

This does me no good. I'm facing a 9 hour flight two weeks from now and could have really used it. But there is a slim bright side to this. As the new iPod Touch finds its way into the public's hand, almost immediately the reviews come pouring out of the tech pundits and reviewers. Fortunately, I read a very favourable review in PC Magazine who gave my new toy their highest rating. This eases the ol' "buyer's remorse" twinge.

But this waiting thing really fries my bacon: unboxing photos everywhere, video reviews posted online, tech website reviews. Its all driving me insane! Its torture. Aside from this, my fellow iPod aficionado, Jabba, who has her new iPod Nano, is in full taunt-mode. Damn!

So, please, send your notes of support and encouragement when convenient. It would help.

Kipper Deal Sounds Likely

Hockey Hearsay on Sportsnet seems to buy in to the "Kipper to sign soon" theory. Signs seem to point to the guy liking the City, and the teams chances at hoisting a cup soon.

Read Hockey Hearsay article here
Read Calgary Herald article here

FYI: The Flames are deep in goal, so the future seems bright in the crease.

Brent Krahn - 5 years of AHL seasoning. High save pct.
Curt McElhinney- Never had a save pct under .900. AHL experience.
Leland Irving - Junior all-star with WHL, and National Team.
Matt Keetly - Proven playoff performer. Good clutch goalie.

Things are looking up, Flames Fans!

I Am Weak

When I bought my first iPod, I had absolutely no idea what an impact it would make on my everyday life. Being a transit user, I use the thing every single work day. Even at work, when I have to work with mind-numbing spreadsheets or some other project deliverable, I pop in the iPod, crank up the Manilow, or the Streisand, and let it work its magic.

But it was purchased in '03. It's been showing its age, the battery barely holds a charge, the screen is all scratched up, she spontaneously reboots for no reason. Time for a change. I had heard of the Apple media event "The Beat Goes On", so I decided to check 'er out. I've been disappointed by these "events" before, but I did decide to give it a try. I made a promise to myself: if the iPod is updated to a widescreen, I'm in!

I logged on to engaget.com's coverage of the event. Jobs begins with his usual update about how Mac software is taking over the world. This is up 100%, that is up 300%, ya-da, ya-da, ya-da. Then comes the new iPod intros. He unveiled the "fatty" (iPod nano), the iPod Classic, then Steve Jobs did something that made me damn near soil myself...

He introduced the iPod touch.

It was a religious experience. After the event was over, I immediately, like a mindless lemming, went to the Apple store with credit card in hand. DAMN! It was down. But rest assured, it did come up again a couple hours later. HALLELUJAH!! Once I was able to get on, I feverishly typed in my delivery info and credit card numbers into the site. How I didn't soil myself during this, I have no idea.

I found out later that a gal that I work with bought a new iPod, someone we fondly refer to as "Jabba". She bought the "fatty". Go figure.

So now, I wait. Sadly, my order was actually a PRE-ORDER. It starts shipping at the end of September. It should be in my trembling hand the first week of October. I've already threatened my children with hand-dismemberment if they touch it.

So I'll wait.

... and wait.

Anyone read the Calgary Sun?

If newspapers were a school, I sort of picture the Calgary Herald as the brainy student, the Globe and Mail as the teacher with the short-sleeve dress shirt with necktie, the National Post as the substitute teacher who wears the golf shirt with jeans, and the Calgary Sun as the gossipy shit disturber who talks like an "A" student, but gets "C's" on the report card.

This mental picture could have been more solidified after reading the Calgary Sun's reporting of the City choosing not to emblazon their vehicles with the large "Support the Troops" decals (pronounced in Canada like "deckle" not "d-KAL"). Check it the article here.

Note the use of language.

"The city has issued an edict". Aside from the grammatical error of not capitalizing the proper noun "City", you usually think of the word "edict" as something hostile, like some despot ruler issuing a decree that all citizens are to bow to his image every morning. This sentence sets the tone for what's to come.

"Stickers were ripped from garbage trucks..." Wow. I have this vision of a group of four thugs arriving on the scene removing these stickers while the City worker begs, with tears streaming, for mercy. "SILENCE!" Bellows the bully, while brandishing a blood-speckled baton.

"Not sure if (they'll) defy the order" The word "defy" you immediately think of someone sticking up for himself, right? David defied Goliath. That Chinese protester-guy defied the tank in Tienanmen Square. The Sun continues to set the scene as a struggle against an oppressive and unjust force.

The article, as a whole, gently suggests to you that the City hates the troops. The report doesn't have the guts to say it, but the general theme is unmistakable. Does this not conflict with the City's track record on charity causes? What about the United Way campaign every November when we try to raise a million bucks for the less fortunate? What about the Breast Cancer fundraising? What about the "Support the Troops" decals that the City will be selling at its facilities? OOPS!! I guess the Sun forgot to mention that last one, eh?

Anyway, friends. Read for yourself. By all means, continue to read the Sun if you prefer. Hey, every once in a while even the healthiest person grabs a Big Mac.

New iMac Revealed

The rumours were right. The new iMacs are significantly different than the previous all-white iMacs. When I saw the first photos, and heard about iLife 08, then saw the new specs, I almost whipped out my credit card and ordered one online. I want! Must have! Gimme!

But I resisted. I took a deep breath. I wiped the drool from my chin and changed my shorts. Then I heard a voice. Was God talking to me? Was it the voice of reason? Was I channeling the spirit of a wise Buddhist monk? I listened. It said, "Oh ye with troubled spirit. Drink not the wine from the look of the barrel. Consider ye the vintages from all the regions."

Not wanting to piss off any spirits, I navigated to the apple store page, jotted down the price and the specs. I then made my cyberway to Memory Express's site, and jotted down the specs and price of a comparable PC.

Here's what I got....

iMac
Cost $1299
2.0 GHz Core 2 Duo (model number not provided)
1 GB RAM
250 GB Hard Drive
ATI Radeon HD 2400 XT with 128MB memory
8x double-layer SuperDrive [DVD +/- RW]
20 inch display

Memory Express
Cost $1098
Intel Core 2 Duo E6550 Processor
G33 chipset motherboard
PC5300 2G DDR2 Memory
250G SATA2 Hard Drive
18x18 DVD writer
8600GT SC video card with 256M
Samsung SyncMaster 206BW 20in Widescreen

Okay, those are the raw specs. But there's more to life than numbers. On the "Pro-Mac" side: the Mac would come with all the software to begin actually using the darn thing. The PC would not. The iMac looks good, suitable for any room. The PC's monitor may look nice, but the box typically is not, and needs to be "stashed" in an aesthetic manner.

On the "Pro-PC" side: the PC is cheaper (yes, I am of Scottish descent). The actual machine is more powerful, I could experiment with the latest cutting-edge games if the whim hits me. I could also upgrade various components to the PC: video card, Hard Drive. The iMac is on lockdown: no touch-ee!

So I will meditate on these thoughts. I'll go to Best Buy and fiddle with the new iMac, pop by Memory Express fiddle with their stuff. I'm curious to see which way I will go.

Enough With The Soccer Whining!

I dig sports. I bought an HDTV so I can be there without being there, I have a ferocious appetite for ESPN, TSN, and sportsnet podcasts, and I follow the scores, standings, gossip, rumours, all that good stuff. So, with this being said, I'm noticing a real annoying trend: soccer bashing.

Soccer has become the latest whipping boy, in part, due to "Beckham Fever". People from all walks are coming out of the wood-work to take pot shots at the "Beautiful Game". They spew the usual rants: its boring, different, foreign, not American.

To you soccer-bashers who don't like any sports:

Just zip it. Complain about something of use, like politics. We get it. You don't like to exert yourself. Sweat is the devil. Turn on "The View", have another donut.

To you soccer-bashers who follow the other North American pro sports:

In top level soccer, you often see some aggressive leg tackles, clash of heads, shoulder-hits, blood is not uncommon. Now, not to name names, but might I remind you, that you follow a North American pro sport where a slap on the arm is considered a "foul". The referee stops play immediately. You follow another one that has extremely rare physical contact, you may see contact during a so-called "play at the plate". You could watch 10 straight games and not see any contact.

In terms of boring? A soccer game is two 45 minute halves with a 15 minute break. A soccer game is done like dinner in under 2 hours. How about baseball. Ever see a two hour MLB game? Ever see a 2 hour NBA game? The final 2 minutes of an NBA game seem like 2 hours with all the time-outs and intentional fouls and free throws, right? And don't get me even started on watching PGA golf. Is soccer 2 hours of pure adrenaline thrills and excitement? Absolutely not. I'm just saying that before you drag out the tired "soccer is boring" argument, you should take a good hard look at the sports that YOU follow.

Hey, soccer is not my favourite sport either. But I've participated in it, taken the time to learn it, and developed some level of appreciation. When did this become a bad thing? When did learning something new become a bad thing?

But, I guess its easier to just give up and hate something rather than invest time and effort to learn, eh? Better stick with something more intellectually stimulating like "The View". At least one won't break a sweat.

Those Crazy Referees, eh?

I love putting together a good list. The recent news about NBA referee Tim Donaghy has me thinking, "even if he wanted to, how much could an NBA referee influence the outcome of a game?" This lead me to come up with...

The Top 7 Sports Where Officials Have the MOST Influence

(1) Soccer - No other game has one person under such complete authoritarian tight-fisted control. Not even the score clock is immune from his ultimate control. There is only one chief referee. He (or she) controls the score clock, may overrule the assistant referees with a wave of the arm, and toss a player at any time for "ungentlemanly conduct". The referee can also award a penalty kick, which is virtually like awarding a goal. Given that many games end up scoreless, this means the referee could easily hand over a win to a team with just one call.

(2) Baseball - This is another game with one Uber-Boss: the Home Plate Umpire. This person's opinion determines the duration of your "at bat". He could call you out on three straight pitches, he could keep your at bat alive for more, increasing your chances for success. His personal strike zone could be large (favouring the pitcher), or scant (favouring the batter). Disagree with his opinion? By all means, express your displeasure, but be prepared to watch the rest of the game from the stands.

(3) Hockey - Finally a sport with two referees, both with equal power (although, technically, one is in charge). The NHL has adapted with the times, upping the number to two referees to compensate for an increasingly fast game. It's embraced technology: a ref may chat with a "video referee" for a second opinion. But either ref can still substantially influence a game if he dishes out power-plays willy-nilly. A disproportionate amount of power-plays gives a team a clear chance of winning. Blow a bunch of calls, you've effectively handcuffed the better team from winning.

(4) Football - Sometimes it seems there are more officials than players out there. So aren't the chances of officiating influence watered down? No way. The side judge can easily whip out his penalty hanky and confiscate a touchdown, even if undeserved. A team approaching the "red zone" can be pushed away with a few select "procedure" calls; a field goal try turns into a punt. But football teams do have a better chance at fighting through bad calls. You still do get multiple downs, and the video replay system is the best in pro sports.

(5) Basketball - Due to the sheer amount of referees, and the torrid pace of scoring, blowing one, or even five calls, is not likely to significantly give the edge to a woefully inferior team. Players can foul out, but coaches use bench management to work around this. Its possible, but not likely that a ref could hand victory to an unlikely team.

(6) Chuckwagon Racing - the barrel is either up, or it has been knocked down. The outrider is either inside the 150 foot line or outside. No referee could blow this call. Nuff said.

(7) Miss Hawaiian Tropics Swimsuit Pageant - who cares about the judging.

What was the title of famed NHL referee Red Storey's autobiography? "Black and White and Never Right".

Patience is a virtue.

"Good things come to those that wait."

These are my two mantras that I repeat to myself as I watch use my PowerBook G4 chug along. What used to be a screaming fast machine now doesn't meet the minimum requirements for some of the newer apps that have caught my fancy. So, I have come to a cross-roads: do I wait for the new iMac, or do I go to Memory Express and scoop up a fiery piece of machinery now. Yes, I realize that the MacBook and MacBook Pro lines have been regularly updated, but we've decided to go with a desktop as our main family PC.

So what's my plan? What I'm going to do is hold out until September. I will stay with Apple if these two conditions are met:

(1) The iMac is aggressively updated. Quad Core not necessary, but 256MB PCI-E graphics card standard, Superdrive standard, 500MB HD standard, and a wide screen display should also be standard. 4:3 is sooooo nineties.

(2) Price point is around $1500. This is the price of my dream machine at Memory Express.

(3) 802.11N is an absolute MUST.

Nice to have: toss in a "certificate" for a free upgrade to iLife 08, if it ever comes out. Apple, you really dropped the ball on this one, you should really throw us casual Mac users a bone.

Nice to have: wireless keyboard/mouse.

The only thing I would miss about leaving the Mac world is GarageBand. There really is no equivalent. My 8 year-old even whips up tunes, sometimes they're actually funny. I can't imagine him using "Reason", pretty sophisticated tool, that.

But, patience is a virtue. Let's see what Apple offers up this summer, if anything at all.

About Software Piracy

"According to the IDC, software piracy worldwide was nearly $40 billion in 2006. For every two dollars' worth of software purchased legitimately, 1 dollar's worth was obtained illegally." This is what TechTarget.com writes in advertising one of its offerings in its July set of white papers.

This is one of those polluted statistics that gets recklessly tossed around, but has no real basis. Yes, it is a problem. Yes, it should be reigned in. But lets put some integrity behind the measurement. Putting all forms of ill-gotten software in the same bucket is good for boosting numbers, but poor for getting a true picture on the problem.

All of the below is software piracy:

- A Mom buys a $15 "learn to spell" PC game for her 5 year-old, lets a friend borrow it and install it.

- A curious avid bit torrent user downloads a $60,000 piece of specialized medical imaging software just to see what its like. He installs it, checks it out, deletes it. At the end, he says to himself, "Gee, neat!"

- A small welding shop has 3 workstations equipped with Windows XP and MS Office. The MS Office software is downloaded and unlicensed.

Let's state now that all of the above scenarios are not legal, and are clear cases of copyright infringement. Bad. However, one of the above is a business generating revenue from business equipment that has not been paid for. Recall the earlier $40 billion dollar figure. If this goes down to $30 billion, can we determine why? Are aloof bit torrent downloaders merely directing their attention elsewhere? Are software license crackdowns working? Are large-scale businesses remembering to license all of their software? If you lump 'em all together, you just don't know.

The IDC's loosey-goosey formula

Some loosey-goosey terms

Its a better litmus test on our driving if we show how many reckless driving charges there are in 2007, versus how many total vehicle citations were issued. Lumping the criminally negligent reckless driver in with the guy cited for going 15 over on the Freeway doesn't give me a clear picture of how people are driving. I hope this parallel isn't too far off to show my point.

I get the feeling that the guys coming up with these piracy figures has a vested interest in coming up with the highest possible number.

Be Kind to Your Kind

This is one of those ramblings where I’m dead sure that most would disagree strongly. But, who knows, maybe I’ll be pleasantly surprised and one or two people can join me in this movement.
During the Stampede, the animal rights people get a little higher profile. Their message is clearly making some ground; the Stampede Rodeo has changed “calf roping” to “tie-down roping”, along with a few other animal friendly rule changes. The result is that the animals are getting some better treatment.

The other day, I happened to drive past the City’s new animal shelter building, new, state-of-the-art, expensive building. The animals get first class treatment, plenty of food, clean kennels, veterinary treatment, and an adoption service.

What does not compute is that we’re pouring all this money, attention, and generosity towards ANIMALS. You may find this surprising, but animals are NOT people. Did we somehow forget that animals are not actual persons? With all the movies out there about talking cows (Barnyard), human-like wolves (Hoodwinked), or wise-cracking raccoons (Over the Hedge), did we lose sight of this?

I hereby propose we shut down the Animal Shelter effective immediately. We also should not fund the Humane Society, not for one second longer. Let’s take all this cash and aim it towards kids. Give every disadvantaged kid a modestly valued Christmas gift. Let every kid participate in a sport of his or her choosing by covering the cost, equipment included. Have every kid sleep inside. Make it so every kid eats. Is this too bizarre for everyone? The concept is kids = people, animals != people.

Generally speaking, I propose that we be “kind to our kind”. In 2005, the US spent more on pets, $34.4 billion, than they did on toys. We spent $14.7 billion spent on pet food while some dirty-faced kid plays with garbage as a toy.

But it’s a free country. We are free to seek companionship from an animal, give one a name, treat it like a child. All this is legal, and considered normal. Unfortunately, its also considered normal to have families sleep in a 1982 Chevette.

Flames Training Camp Cancelled

I have it here, the new lines for the 2007-08 Calgary Flames. So, there should be no need to hold training camp come September. Here is the depth chart for the upcomming season:

Forwards
Tanguay Langkow Iginla
Huselius Conroy Nolan
Nilson Lombardi Moss
Friesen Primeau Boyd

Defense
Phaneuf Regehr
Aucoin Sarich
Hale Warrener
Giordano Ri. Regehr

Goaltender
Kiprusoff
Krahn


.... you're welcome.

Fending For Myself, Will I Survive?

So, I bundled up the wife and kids and shipped them down to the Farm. They'll hang out there for a couple weeks while the oldest boy tackles swim camp. This means I get the house to myself for the next little while. But after I watched the car drive off, I turned around and was ... well ... lost. What the hell do I do now?

In the pre-kids era, I would have found absolutely no difficulty in finding something to get into, something to work on. Now, is absolutely mind boggling how much these two little monsters take over your life. The slogan used to be "looking out for number one", but now I'm easily a distant third. It takes one moment, like being alone in the house, to make this concept clear. This must be how those wacky salmon feel when they swim up the Fraser River to spawn. It's not in their best interest to do this, they will die. But, they do it anyway for the kids, kids they'll never see. At least they don't have to worry about report cards, terrible two's, and buying a mini-van. mmmmmm.... salmon (Homer voice).

Luckily, I do have a fair bit of shows that I zapped on the trusty ol' PVR, a huge backlog of CSI; and the honeymoon period on the HDTV has not subsided yet, which is surprising. I'll also try to recapture my previous mastery of the art of taking a nap. But, in the end, I'll probably end up doing something kid related, like assembling that wood play center for the backyard, or something like that.

But the first thing to do is figure out how that darn washing machine works...

Gearin' Up

Stampede is over a week old, but you can tell that things are starting to ramp up. Stephen Avenue is rife with music acts and tables of shoddy merchandise ready to be sold. Does anyone know of any other city that is so into its local Fair than Calgary?

First thing to do is get a breakfast and lunch schedule. Now, I recall a super huge one at the Petro-Can tower, there's another at the Sun-Life building, but not sure of the days. If anyone knows of an online schedule, I beg of you to post it in the comments. Of all the places that I've worked, its always a generally accepted fact that its expected that the Firm will lose man hours due to Stampede Breakfasts and Lunches.

Next is to set aside time for the company party. Now, as you know, I work for the government, so any partying that involves the consumption of beer must be done OFF HOURS. So be it. We'll leave the noon-hour boozin' to the executives in the private sector.

After this, its time to think about the Stampede Grounds: where to get the ride passes for the kids. They have to ride the rides on the Midway, don't they? So, I recall that they're being sold at Mac's this year, not Safeway. Must remember this. We also have to think about which day to take off to go to the Grounds, which involves quite a bit of strategy. You want to pick a day favourable in terms of weather, while choosing a day that is not especially busy.

Next on the list is to check the Stampede Gear. Boots? Shirts? Jeans? Got to make sure this is all in order. You don't want to look like a dork wearing khakis and a golf shirt.

Sometimes you can also luck out with some extra entertainment with the protesters. You get the usual crowd all year, but sometimes the Stampede can bring out some bonus entertainment. Last year, the Animal Rights group was especially entertaining, some folks dressed in funeral gear pretending to cry while holding up pictures of dead animals. Pretty sure those seals weren't killed at the Stampede, ma'am.

Anyway, back to that online Stampede Breakfast and Lunch guide. The search continues...

5 Retired NHL Players My Kids Will Never See

I've been following alot of NHL Draft coverage on the days leading up to the 2007 NHL Entry Draft in Columbus. When you cover these things, the Hockey Press always drags out a bunch of history of famous busts, or diamonds in the rough.

For some reason it got me thinking of past players, players that my boys will never see play live, only in the archives. Here are 5 NHL players my boys will never see play live that I'm most disappointed about. Players I've seen in person.

(1) Wayne Gretzky - The natural true regret. The fact that my hockey-mad boys will never see Gretzky play live just doesn't make life seem fair. I saw him with the Oilers and Kings, and each time I watched him out there, I always reminded myself that this was a sight to behold, something to tell the kids and grandkids about. Seeing Gretzky play live makes you realize just how much he makes his team-mates look good. I'm telling you that if I played on Gretzky's wing, I would score 20. Not only was he a wizard with play-making and passing, he is the all-time leading goal-scorer. He is just the all-time ultimate hockey player, the one you wished most you could take your kids out to see.

(2) Mario Lemieux - The guy just oozed talent out of every pore. I swear he played with a 8 foot long stick, he made defensemen look contortionists. If he had the puck on his forehand and you tried for the puck, you were dead. In a blink, it was on his backhand and he was away. Like a cat toying with a half-dead mouse. It was ridiculous, almost unfair when he was playing. And he wasn't even all that fast, or physical, just deadly.

(3) Scott Stevens - I don't recall there ever being a player that had you saying "is he on the ice?" as much as when this guy played against your team. If he was patrolling the blue line, you could sense the opposing forwards playing the puck carefully, like with a "dump and chase". I imagine it being like a mailman trying to deliver to the door with a pit bull in your yard.

(4) Al McInnis - Seeing him play live is a totally different experience than seeing him on TV for one reason: that freakish slap-shot. Seeing, rather hearing, a McInnis cannon from the point left you silently praying that he didn't kill anyone. I remember going to games just pleading to the heavens that the other team would take a penalty so the Flames could go on the Power Play.

(5) Patrick Roy - Aside from being a great goalie, he had all these weird superstitions that were funny to see in person. He'd do his little "goose chin" move with his mask, he never stepped on a line when skating to his crease from the bench, right before a face off he'd bang the holy hell out of the goal posts, not to mention other quirky things. He wasn't particularly fast, or big, or acrobatic, but he just plain kept the puck out of the net. Period.

But, all is not lost. There's a crop of new talent out there playing right now that might have my boys saying the exact same thing to their kids. You never know.

Cite It, or Bite It!

When reading a professional article, or attending a presentation from corporate peers, certain things are assumed. For instance, the presenter will be attired correctly. You don't expect your expert to be clad in a tank top with shorts and a pair of flip-flops. Also, you expect a professional tone with the language. One shouldn't hear things like "Dude, Service Oriented Architectures ROCK! Your a f**king moron if you write too much sh*tty code, man!". You also expect correct grammar and spelling. These are pretty safe assumptions, I'm sure.

Well, esteemed readers, I hereby would like to propose another de facto standard with professional articles, presentations, and the like. I propose a taboo with using the words "studies show", or use of the word "percent", unless you provide the source you are quoting. I'm sure most of the time, people throw around these words quite innocently, with good intentions. But there are those who float around these words for the purpose of evil. I remember a presentation from a software vendor that stated "85% of IT projects do not get done on time", and then went on to say that this number would go down to 6% if you "buy our product". His sources were not cited. In my opinion, this is a deliberate attempt to mislead, a vested interest in omitting or forgetting the source.

I recognize that some intentions are noble. For example, in researching articles, I have in front of me an article by Jason Cohen for Better Software Magazine (April 2007, p39) who says, "Studies show that the average inspection takes nine man-hours per 200 lines of code...". Perfect! Just the information I'd like to reference in some of my project documents. But who did this study? When? An inspection of LISP, SmallTalk, C# code? I can't use this! He's probably correct, but where in the hell did he get these precise numbers?

So, here's a challenge for you. The next time you are at a presentation, and hear the word "percent", consider it a personal insult if its not qualified. Hearing "studies show" without citing the study is the same as hearing "you're too stupid to know where I got this from, just agree, dummy". Be insulted. If its an article, imagine replacing it with a picture of a big ol' middle finger cast in your direction. Be offended. I heartily recommend retaliating by simply asking "Excuse me, just wondering where these numbers come from? Sounds intriguing, so I'd like to follow up with that source, if possible?" Be prepared for the standard, "I don't have that information with me. I'll get it to you." You'll get a date with Jessica Alba sooner than you'll get the info from this guy on his study.

It should be a simple thing. If the idea, or the numbers, don't come from you, then cite it! Cite it, or bite it! Catchy slogan, I should trademark that.


"Doctors say he's got a 50/50 chance of making it, though there's only a 25% chance of that!"- Capt. Ed Hocken, "The Naked Gun"

The Worst Part of Transit Disruption

When this whole transit disruption thing started happening, I did expect some unpleasant side effects. I knew my regular daily rhythm would become irregular. I recognized that this black cloud of union strike-action would be cast over us riders until there was a new deal. I also knew that buses could just simply not show up leaving you at your stop standing there with your pants around your ankles. This led to me carpooling to the LRT recently. But there's side effect whose impact I severely miscalculated.

The C-Train experience.

When you are a regular commuter on the Express Bus, travelling daily from a bedroom community to the downtown core, the clientele on the bus are generally cut from the same cloth. We're mostly white-collar professionals, we conduct ourselves with a moderate degree of dignity, we mainly just keep to ourselves. The chit-chat that you do overhear is generally centered around current events or sports, but is generally convivial.

Monday was my first commute by C-Train.

The Train is a whole different ball game. The first thing you realize when you step on the train, is that the average IQ plummets dangerously low, to the mid-range double-digits. You do see professionals, but then again you see others who are in various states of disrepair. Some C-Train clientele would leave the most steadfast believers in Darwin's Theory of Natural Selection at a loss for explanation.

How else do you explain the full-figured "lady" who wears a backpack that most Marines would find too large on a Train packed with riders during afternoon rush hour? Her girth alone is an obstacle, adding the backpack is like salt in the wound.

Then there's the shaved head, overalls wearing, greasy-looking guy talking loudly on his cell phone proudly sharing his conversation with the entire train of how he got so f**ked up last night and was going to smash this guy's face in. Yes sir. You are a tough one. How I did not soil myself with fear when I heard this I have no idea. But I would probably drink alot too if I attracted the type of women that you probably do. Maybe I should introduce you to the "big boned" lady with the backpack.

Then there's the 15 year-old white kid with the gangsta rap blaring out of his iPod at a volume that is sure to make his ears bleed. Hey, nobody mess with this guy, he'll pull out a nine, bust a cap. Hey MC PipSqueek, do you really think we are the least bit intimidated by this sorry display? You are a pathetic worm, and don't forget my fries next time I'm at McDonalds.

There are people on the C-Train that would annoy Ghandi. But what is ironic is that the City started an ad campaign warning riders that bad behaviour will earn you a fine. Problem is, I've never ever heard of enforcement. What the City should do is start blasting these morons with tickets, put the money back into the transit system. Judging by the number of these mental-defectives, we'll be riding solid gold C-Trains equipped with leather recliners in no time.

For the sake of my sanity, I really hope the City and the Transit Union can get a deal done.