Like a good Dad, I have passed on the religion of my forefathers to my two sons, both eight and three years of age. My oldest is a now a devout convert, practicing our religion with a fervor not yet seen in my family. However, I have failed him. I have failed my son. Because we live in a very religious city, Calgary, getting tickets to go to the Saddledome to see the Flames is a challenge. I feel like a one-armed guy at a rubic's cube contest. I pray to the hockey gods "Oh Lords of the Rink! Deliver to me tickets! Have mercy upon me!".
Yesterday, the planets all aligned. I received an email from Ticketmaster. My turn on the waiting list was up. Tickets were put aside for me. I promptly brushed away a tear that had trickled down my cheek and nabbed 'em.
But, I have an evil plan. A cruel hoax. An act of sheer debauchery is about to be experienced by my eight year-old.
The game is the Monday night game against the St Louis Blues. I'm going to hide his Flames jersey in the car somewhere. I'm then going to say at dinner, "So, are you ready for hockey practice?" He'll refute the very idea of a practice being that night, so I'll inform him that I got a phone call from the coach. We'll then get ready, I'll grab his equipment, toss it in the trunk, and away we go.
When we pull up to the train, or to the parking lot, I'll offer my full confession and reveal that I have lied. I suspect the reaction to my confession will be more Oprah than Jerry Springer. But tune in later for a blow-by-blow account on how this all went down.
4 comments:
Good on you for playing tricks on a mere boy for your own (and our own) amusement and pleasure! But it leaves one to ask...what of thy wife? She gets to stay home (yet again) with the youngling and miss another game. Maybe she'll even cook you a nice dinner before you go...
She better cook a nice dinner before we go, or there will be HELL TO PAY.
I sure hope she doesn't read this...
I enjoy hockey, Coaches Corner and all, so I wish you wouldn't make it sound like going to church. It makes me wonder if there really is a Don.
Update: The pieces are all in place for "the lie". He thinks he's being whisked away to hockey practice after school and dinner. His mother is in on it.
Who knew lying to your own offspring could be so much fun?
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